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This piece made me feel homesick for somewhere Iโ€™ve never lived, but by far my favourite part was this: โ€œThe human experience is just that, isnโ€™t it? Persistence. Living with the fruits or the consequences of trying again and again. At least thatโ€™s how I want my life to be.โ€

Going to keep repeating that to myself - thank you! x

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Thank you! โ˜บ๏ธ

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so interesting: โ€œitโ€™s important to have both magnitude and direction for ambition.โ€ iโ€™ve always felt that ambition without direction wasnโ€™t ambition at all, just low self-worth. the ambient feeling that big external accomplishments are needed to justify oneโ€™s existence.

i think discourse around ambition gets it backwards. its described as finding an arbitrary external action (founding a company, getting rich, publishing, getting tenure, etc) to cultivate a positive internal quality (self-worth, esteem, โ€œagencyโ€ etc). but ambition, to me, is the other way around. itโ€™s noticing a positive internal quality, and then finding a way to externalize those life-affirming qualities more broadly in the external world and in others. ambition without direction is just megalomania.

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Absolutely the ending noticing a positive internal quality and then externalizing it is ๐Ÿ’ฏ

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Beautifully written. and I love that SF has ultimately made you feel more calm. (Hey, neighbor! Iโ€™m in San Francisco, too ๐Ÿ‘‹๐Ÿผ)

โ€œNew York makes you desire intensity and status, SF makes you desire thought-leadership and freedom.โ€ Fascinating and accurate, from what I know of NY at least--never lived there and have enjoyed my visits, but donโ€™t think I could live there. I have been in the Bay Area all my life and Iโ€™d say thatโ€™s 100% the case in my experience.

Also loved the Rilke quote about living our lives in widening circles. Love me some Rilke. โœจ

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Thank you! Yes Rilke is so good :)

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i think this is one of my favorite things you've written! my experience moving to new york echoes the same themes of effort, uncertainty, reinvention :)

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Thank you Anita!!

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